Shit Sri Lankan internet-forum ers call themselves !




Gosh. I ve got to just get out on the tiles, as in surfing around the web for daft stuff more often.

Generally I do not waste time reading comments made by my sweetie countrymen ( generally male-testosterone lives ok).  But then, today,  what with the impending impeachment and so on publicised for weeks  (cos the Sri Lanka Sandya version of Sandy storm just does NOT make sexy news for the media), I followed the charge sheet which is the big news since FUTA. Well the average memory of the Sinhalese has a span of 2 weeks as the late VP famously put it or is credited to have . So at present,  the judiciary therefore are in the Lanka Limelight.

However, though the proposed impeachment is a serious business, I was distracted from that charge sheet which I read thoroughly, by the names of the CJ herself, other familiar lawyer-people I know and finally by the pseudonyms chosen by the Forum-shriekers.

Ok, first the Hon (Dr.) …. The CJ of Sri Lanka is titled the Hon. (Dr.) (Mrs.) Upatissa Atapattu Bandaranayake Wasala Mudiyanse Ralahamilage Shirani Anshumala Bandaranayake. That makes Mark Fernando a mere John Smith in comparison. I wonder if she is Anshumala or Anushamala. Just wondering cos in these days of copy-paste one little typo like that would be repeated ad lib. Never once did they give the general abbreviation The blah blah what’s-her-face who will be for the purposes of this charge sheet only hereinafter be referred to as “CJ Shirani.”

After pausing to note the incredible names of real people I knew once apon a Hulftsdorp Hill such as J C Weliamuna ( Weli) and a former Criminal Law Lecturer Kalinga Indratissa which could make a mere Perera or Fernando blush, I scanned the usual suspects in the comment parade below. Unnbelievable! Pandukhabaya uses words such as balderdash, James Bond actually spoke some sense, Piranha keeps coming back for more… M y Foote very olde English, Wuliangguobinjiu I didn’t understand – if you do, please enlighten.

Cast your eyes down at groundviews or DBSJ’s more controversial posts on a given day and just take a look at the chosen web-identities that surface gopher-like from below.

I think am onto this today, cos after posting something nice by Riaz Cader on Wasgamuwa, I received two spam comments that had evaded even Media Temple’s super spam-trawler. P A Thola and Banda Akka turned up to with the comments that Wasgamuwa was “great for growing vegetables” and ” I cant agree with you more”. Maybe they didn’t know that I actually take pleasure in glancing at the odd inane spam comment.

Ok, I admit that since I read this really entertaining thingy in the New Yorker about a girl who went out jogging and whilst looking at her digital device, kept seeing weirdly-named wireless network IDs in the region pop up such as “the man on the 4th floor is douche” “funnybunnygirls” and so on… i kept noticing how people ‘go to town’ when choosing Forum IDs on the internet.

Here are some I collected:  sonduru sitha, (yeah….)  kalu albert, (no, really !!)  pini baba, chooty baba, jughead, these were real cute…  tamils4eeellum, chandi putha,  Whatsupottawatamil … (ah well, why not ?)  youbrokein,  SinhaHelaya,  EelamSaRu,  Kalu Karolis, ( what’s with the Kalu theme ?) LOL , True Nation,  afool,  Bedrock Barney,  Hunchback,  Native Veddah,  Pro Bono Publico,  Monkey,  Candidly Shrimp,   Lanka Liar,  Hella Archie. Yes,  thassit so far but I keep an eye out for any gems unnoticed under a mossy stone, etc.

I never read what they write cos it’s mostly shite save for a few good responses and honestly there are some who actually create multiple internet IDs and turn it into a pastime. But hey, with many village gossip opportunities gone and the eternal craving for an alter ego thriving with the anonymity of the internet… if you must… then make your Avatar or ID something original, quirky and plain ridiculous. Like Pini Baba !


  1. Interesting G3.

  2. Kalu Albert was the school nickname of a very black cricketer. I have sometimes wondered if it is him, posting all the way from Australia.

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